Tuesday, January 25

Too many people know about Pommer and I. And is that my faulth? Partly. Yunus said to me today, almost judgemental "I thought you were gonna keep it a secret."
As if I had written it on the walls. I don't want to talk or think about it again, it's getting old and it's annoying. The whole B class was talking about it, Hulya said. Damn it, why does Martinez know how to convince me into saying these things? It's all his faulth. Yes, it is. Damn him.

I spoke to Hulya about Martinez, about what he'd said and done, and as one of the best female Dr. Phils I know, she said that Martinez probably liked me - "like that", but that he was just afraid to commit. Yeah he's afraid to commit and yeah he likes me - not "like that" though. You think?
As I did with all the 1000s boys I've fallen for, I've made an inner list of "reasons why he may/may not like me". Once I get ahead of myself, he'll do something to prove me wrong.

I got an idea! I could set up a false diary and give him the link? Please stop this horrid thinking, I must be an idiot.

Tonight I think I'm going with Amalie and Leah to a real Dr. Phil class! Or well... psy...psy.. I can't spell it. The thing where you think a lot about stuff. I'm looking forward to... getting out of this house.

I got a folder from KG about the media production school in Lyngby. It has a journalism line and I'll make 516kroner a week. Still, it doesn't demand good grades and it doesn't give you a graduation diploma. I'm doubting, you see. What do I want?

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